Skip to main content

Even with the imposition of President Biden’s private-employer vaccine mandate—possibly for only a very short time, indeed—it seems that a full-time, or even predictable, return to the office is as far away as ever.

Major banks, technology companies and other firms have scrapped those plans thanks to the Omicron variant, and a sense that Covid-19 is going to linger longer than most first imagined…. These reversals have persuaded many business leaders to avoid specific return dates. Instead, they are adopting more nuanced workplace strategies that recognize that Covid-19 will be around for the indefinite future.

This does not make Jamie Dimon happy. One of those formerly very confident executives with mask on their face, he’s already been forced to concede that the status quo ante is probably a pipe dream, certainly during the Omicron surge. But he’ll be damned if he’s going to let some unscientific nonsense keep him from forcing people back as often as he can at the earliest possible opportunity (or let Jane Fraser make him look weak).

"If you aren't going to get vaxxed, you won't be able to work in that office. We're not going to pay you not to work in the office," Dimon said. "We want people to get vaccinated."

That sounds an awful lot like James Gorman’s since-retracted “if you want to get paid New York rates, you work in New York.” Actually, it sounds a good deal tougher, boiling down to the somewhat pithier, “If you want to get paid, you work.” And he sounds like he fucking means it, at least for now.

Asked about a possible hybrid work policy in the future by which employees split their time between home and the office, Dimon said: "We don't have to answer this right away."

JPMorgan's Dimon warns unvaccinated New York staff could be terminated [CNN Business]
Surging Covid-19 Puts an End to Projected Return-to-Office Dates [WSJ]
Bulk of Biden Administration’s Vaccine Mandate Takes Effect [WSJ]

For more of the latest in litigation, regulation, deals and financial services trends, sign up for Finance Docket, a partnership between Breaking Media publications Above the Law and Dealbreaker.

Related

Jamie Dimon Candidate

It’s Not Jamie Dimon’s Fault He Can’t Help Sounding Presidential

Maybe all of you Bernie Bros should have thought about that before scaring him out of the race and leaving us with Joe Biden.

By World Economic Forum (Flickr: The Global Financial Context: James Dimon) [CC BY-SA 2.0], via Wikimedia Commons

(Earnings) Season’s Greetings

Nothing is f*cked, dude.

By World Economic Forum (Flickr: The Global Financial Context: James Dimon) [CC BY-SA 2.0], via Wikimedia Commons

Infected JPMorgan Employees Haven’t Spread COVID To Bank’s Bottom Line

Citigroup, on the other hand, is still feeling under the weather.

(Getty Images)

JPMorgan Trader Gets COVID At Highly Inconvenient And Embarrassing Time

A week before his colleagues are being ordered back to the office and at the same time that Jamie Dimon is extolling the plan’s virtues.

confused-confusion-puzzled-scratch-head

No One Knows What The Hell Is Going On

Davos? No. Holiday parties? Maybe. Vaccine mandates? It’s up to Neil Gorsuch.

By World Economic Forum (Flickr: The Global Financial Context: James Dimon) [CC BY-SA 2.0], via Wikimedia Commons

Jamie Dimon Will Conquer Wealth Management Instead Of The White House

He’s got to do something for the next four years.

Photo: Getty Images.

Layoffs Watch: Credit Suisse Prime Brokers

Turns out you don’t need them if you’re not offering prime brokerage services anymore.

(Getty Images)

Jamie Dimon Is Getting Lonely

And if you’re a JPMorgan trader, it’s your job to keep him company.