Banks

Hey, when you’re in Thomas Gottstein’s shoes, you’ll grasp at any disreputable straw you can find.

Boris has a little pre-byelection present for you.

While some doubt Revlon will screw over its erstwhile ally, the company hasn’t hesitated to do it before.

Perhaps now the regulatory gods will show the bank favor for once.

Your funds don’t actually have to help save the world, but they do have to live up to their marketing materials.

If you don’t leave, you still won’t make as much as your peers elsewhere, but the gap won’t be quite as embarrassing.

As you’d expect from the flaming stagecoach.

Turns out rumors sometimes are just rumors.

What will come first? The cannings or the unsolicited offer?

After imposing a few more modest hurdles for its employees the clear in cheating, the diversity interviewing policy shall return.

In fairness to him or her, there were working on a day off.

Pfffft. Who isn’t living in an unrelenting hellscape all the time? God.

If they have to they’ll just fix the whole damned place themselves, and distribute Charlie Scharf’s bonus among them.

Sherrod Brown would like to remind him of what happens when senators get angry at Wells CEOs.

What with all of the cops crawling all over the place and all.

Charlie Scharf is probably not even made aware of penalties under eight figures.

And now, like the NFL, it’s getting sued over it.

Jamie Dimon’s one-time-only special retention bonus will definitely not happen again.

Despite earlier reassurances to the contrary, where there’s this much smoke, there is a raging risk and compliance fire.

And now the CFPB is levying its own charges.

Another day, another fat finger.

It’s nice that they’re all so close together, and maybe also committing the same crimes.

A modicum of competence and attention to fiduciary duties may be necessary to get that legal liability discharge.

Because they’re back for another look.

The better to spot the obvious fraud with. And also maybe to read this lawsuit it just filed.

In fact, Norges Bank Investment Management would like a pretty thorough check before it forgoes its right to sue everyone.

It is if you’re Credit Suisse.

For once, things go according to plan for the DoJ.

David Solomon better hope Lollapalooza pays well if Glass Lewis gets its way.

The House of Gorman wants to be the home of the family office.

They’re apparently not as “qualified” as their white co-applicants, either.

And that’s what it’s getting, to temporarily cover over all of the rot beneath.

At least when it comes to rogue states and uniquely recalcitrant debtors.

Wells had another Wells-y year, but no matter.