Banks

Who knows? Maybe Georges Elhedery will be more patient than all of his predecessors and win the crown… eventually.

After a decade, Tom Hayes is finally free and clear.

Now that the formerly beleaguered other DB is raking it in, Shikha Gupta wants to get paid.

You know, before she said all of that stuff about breaking all of those promises it made to the Justice Department.

Not that a little recession is worth much worry when World War III is around the corner.

Paul Krugman can’t hold that Nobel Prize over his head any more!

U.S. Secretary of Defense, CC BY 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons

It’s a relatively small price to pay, given the more than $54 billion already flushed down that particular toilet.

That’ll teach it.

They’re whiter than white! No, wait, that’s not what they meant.

Oh, wait, too late.

Rationalizing the $600 million hole in banks’ bottom line.

Bonus caps are out, not that it will matter much.

Oh, are they women? We hadn’t noticed.

Dealmakers without deals to make are also dealmakers without jobs.

Fat fingers do not have the force of law (anymore).

Michael Barr’s also gonna have a real close look at those living wills.

Let’s have ein Kaffee and talk Cum-Ex, Jamie.

He or she’s got a law degree and seems unlikely to be a welcome presence.

Failing to keep track of the untrackable is proving very expensive for banks.

And the simplest way to do that is just to limit the number of mortgages it writes.

Prosecutors can save themselves the trouble going forward.

And the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau insists on helping.

A half-size bonus is arguably preferable to a pink slip. Arguably.

Even Wells Fargo employees will be hard-pressed to violate this rule.

This is even worse than a $1 billion settlement.

And that’s not us saying it: It’s a judge.

The bottom line only matters to Republicans when they’re not making cheap populist points.

Seems the Russkis aren’t cooperating with big banks’ plans to GTFO.

Party cells in multinational global finance companies’ offices in nominally Communist countries is exactly how Marx drew it up.

Your funds don’t actually have to help save the world, but they do have to live up to their marketing materials.

If you don’t leave, you still won’t make as much as your peers elsewhere, but the gap won’t be quite as embarrassing.

As you’d expect from the flaming stagecoach.

Turns out rumors sometimes are just rumors.