Hedge Funds

And would you all please cool it about the SEC’s home-team judges, for heaven’s sake?

It’s good to be king of the hedge-fund chickens. And also still CEO at the time.

In fairness to the hedge fund manager, it may be a 12 million-way tie.

If Exegesis Capital will invest based on the ex-chief of staff’s ability to read people in Washington, we might steer clear.

I wouldn’t want to be Sandy Alderson if the Big Guy doesn’t get a parade this year.

Smoke and mirrors, indeed!

So perfect, in fact, that it has no more need of Carl Icahn, nor he of it.

He’ll probably just settle for the whole of Star Island. Maybe.

The hedge fund manager’s retirement project—destroying his bitterest rival—comes to a conclusion in a Winnipeg jail cell.

As when he was a congressman, there’s a pretty high minimum investment requirement.

Because that judge will be the one fulfilling his prophecy about going to jail.

Shame has never been a big part of Kelly Loeffler’s constitution.

This is how you become a billionaire many times over.

The great semantic debate of, uh, this week is over!

The Ackmanaissance comes to the perfect capitalist fantasy.

Or just choose not to have investor, but do that before you’ve done something the SEC can fine you for.

We move a step closer to the inevitable SPAC merging with itself.

On second glance, yea, Alvin Hellerstein understands why you might think there’s a conflict of interest here.

Said Haidar was not expecting good news quite this quickly, which makes it very bad news for him.

David Einhorn’s symptoms have been downgraded to mild.

Let’s just pretend this whole stock-picking thing never happened, because in a very real way, it didn’t.

Playing FTSE in the Ackmanaissance.

And Odey’s not gonna like Pentwater Capital’s plans for Rio Tinto.

Ex-jail guard union boss doesn’t want to go to jail, actually.

York Capital is going private equity because the hedge fund thing is not working out.

The less British they are, the better!

Getting its money back would be nice, too.

The torch has been passed to a new generation, and at a steep discount.

You don’t want to be the guy who strikes a deal days before Muddy Waters, uh, strikes.

As the CEOs of the various COVID vaccine makers would tell them, timing is everything.

The former Och-Ziff Capital Management is done with its bribery dealings.

He’s going to focus full-time on losing your money. (And the chickens. And defending himself against sexual assault charges.)

Remember this, revolutionaries, when the reckoning comes.

Turns out, the proposal is against it.