Good news for hedge funds, bad news for skinflint banks.
And David Solomon & co. are still paying for the sins of others.
BriMoy & co. are gonna hold on to what’s rightfully yours for your own good.
Average comp is down 50% at 200 West Street, unless you're a robot, in which case, you're taking John Rogers' job.
We're no math geniuses, but can Deutsche Bank cut bonuses back from nothing?
The president-elect is underpaid.
If you can't replace him, you better pay him.
Alisdair Warren has not mended fences.
John Cryan explains why Deutsche Bank missed huge again, and ponders the existence of joy.
Is this the last year that i-bankers will ask their fundie friends for a holiday season bridge loan?
The world didn’t even come close to ending so you can forget about those extra few feet on the new boat.
Instead of Christmas carols in the lobby, Barclays will be pumping "Let The Bodies Hit The Floor" on repeat this holiday season.
In fairness, this IS Credit Suisse.
You're gonna wanna cash those bonus checks ASAP.
Pro: No one willingly lives in Frankfurt so you can demand a raise. Con: No one willingly lives in Frankfurt.
If bank CEOs can't take a bonus despite persistent losses, what the fuck are we even doing here?