Deutsche Bank Fined $13 Million For Scandal It Could Really Use To Pay Future Fines From Other Scandals
Or, you know, to help it stay afloat.
Banks
Trump Asks Jamie, BriMo And Corbat "WTF Is Happening To My Market, You Guys?"
So even the White House doesn't know who's running Wells Fargo.
Goldman Sachs Is Doing Apple's Innovation For It These Days
DJ D-Sol is sampling Angelo Mozilo on Goldman's Apple Card plans.
Current, Former Heads Of Goldman International Now Have Something Else In Common
But really, who at the bank hasn’t been indicted in Malaysia at this point?
Italian Banks No Longer As Bad, Still Very Italian
Progress, but not time to shout out a celebratory, “Basta!”
Bonus Watch '19: Hey, Still-Employed Equities Trader, Keeping Your Job Is Your Bonus
You still have a gig trading equities, and you want more? Are traders greedy or something?
Layoff Watch '19: Wells Fargo Has A "Location Strategy" For Telecommuters That Will Require Actual Commuting
An insider tells us that The Stagecoach is asking non-customer facing telecommuters to uproot their lives or find a new job.
EXCLUSIVE: Rumor Has It That Less Than 20% Of JPM Summer Associates Are Going To Become Real JPM Associates
Jamie Dimon is apparently quite unimpressed with his Summer People.
HSBC Decides That It Won't Survive 19 Months Of John Flint's Leadership
The board is saying "HSBC ya later!" to its still-brand-new CEO.
Wells Fargo Does Not Appreciate Being Taken Advantage Of, Would Like Its Money Back Now
Happy Friday, Wells Fargo tech vendors, we hope you like irony!
Layoffs Watch ’19: Barclays Wants To Be More Like Credit Suisse
And unfortunately for Edward Bramson and the 3,000 of you without jobs, it’s not in the “deemphasize the investment bank” kind of way.
![By World Economic Forum from Cologny, Switzerland [CC BY-SA 2.0], via Wikimedia Commons](https://dealbreaker.com/.image/ar_16:9%2Cc_fill%2Ccs_srgb%2Cfl_progressive%2Cg_faces:center%2Cq_auto:good%2Cw_620/MTYxMjc3MzA2MTYwODE3NjUz/thiam.jpg)
Tidjane Thiam Tells Fed Where To Stick Its Stress Test
‘Cuz that’s the only thing Credit Suisse is failing at these days.
Capital One Attempts To Ease Customer Concern Over Massive Hack With Stats, Fails Miserably
Only 140,000 Social Security numbers were stolen, the other 99% are almost definitely safe...wait, what?
Layoff Watch '19: It's Citi's Turn To Cull Its Traders
Everyone else is doing it, so now Michael Corbat is too.
Some Deutsche Bank Severance Packages Even Included Keeping Your Old Email For A Few Weeks
The Deutsche Bank layoffs are going as well as we thought.
Jeffrey Epstein’s Banker Screws Over Jeffrey Epstein’s Bank
Jes Staley, who once bought a hedge fund with Epstein’s help, is taking his piece of Deutsche Bank’s prime brokerage.
Deutsche Bank Somehow Still A Thing That Exists
Admitting to collecting fees from a notorious sex criminal is somehow only the third-worst thing that has happened to Deutsche Bank in the last 24 hours.
Wells Fargo's Charlotte I-Bankers Morale Suffering Because Everyone Is Getting Fat On Fast Food And Constantly Taking Massive Dumps
Due to new office policy, One Wells Fargo Center literally has The McSh!ts.
Morgan Stanley’s Still No. 1 In Trading So Could You Stop Harping On How Much Closer To No. 2 It Is Now?
No, James Gorman isn’t any more interested in hearing about how great retail banks are doing, either, thank you.
Mike Corbat Will Fire All Of You If That’s What It Takes To Hold On To This Feeling
The Citi chief has scratched and clawed his way to the top from the depths, and he’s not gonna let anyone—least of all bankers—drag him back down.
New JPMorgan ETF Robot May Not Be Cool, But It Is Cheap
J.D. & co. are betting that’ll be enough to keep the twenty- and thirty-somethings rolling in to their local chase branch.
We'll Give You One Guess Which Bank Was Lending To Jeffrey Epstein
Oh, Deutsche, you beautiful monster.