commentary
The Winkelvii Acquired A CryptoKitties-Based Startup Founded By Another Pair Of Identical Twins, And Those Are All Words We Just Typed
Tyler and Cameron are all about The Brothers Cock Foster and their "nifties."
Dying Industry Pins Hope On Idiots Buying Into An Impossible Trade Deal
Hedge funds are finding Alpha in the fallacy of a US/China trade accord.
Area Stock Market Still Being Gaslit By Controlling Older Boyfriend
Why would Larry Kudlow lie to Mr. Market? He LOVES Mr. Market!
Lloyd Blankfein Attempts A Clapback Tweet, Ends Up With A Flaming Cooperman On His Hands
Uncle Lloyd falls prey to the old billionaire curse of forgetting to not engage with Elizabeth Warren.
Jay Powell Takes Literal "Same Sh!t, Different Day" Approach To Today's Congressional Testimony
Big Pow is back on The Hill for a second day of questions, and he is making it clear he has a whole lot of nothing new to say.
Liquidnet CEO Sued For Being Allegedly Overcurious About What His Female Employee "Does For Sex"
Seth Merrin is being sued for exhibiting a 1989-level of office horniness in a 2019 office setting.
More Senior Traders Are Taking Their Butter And Going Home* From Goldman Sachs
*"Home" in this case being BlueCrest Capital Management.
Hedge Fund Helps Ensure Eager Shooters Won’t Be Without Their AR-15s
Remington may not be making any money on them, but Whitebox Advisors sure is.
Guy Who Founded Uber Realizes He Owns Way Too Much Uber Stock
Travis Kalanick wasted no time getting about $500 million lighter on his UBER shares.
The NBA Needs Less Drama And Fewer Games
Fining the Clippers for resting Kawhi wouldn't be necessary if there were fewer games on the schedule.
Good News, Single Ladies, Steve Schwarzman Owns Bumble Now
Blackstone owns everyone's favorite feminist dating app...and that's quite the sentence.
Masa Son's Masterwork Is A PowerPoint Presentation About WeWork That Will One Day Hang In The Louvre
One solitary slide in the WeWork autopsy report to SoftBank investors is a true encapsulation of the artist's soul.
Robinhood, Which Is Not A Video Game For Trading Real Money, Has A Cheat Code That Allows Users To Get Infinite Money
Press X, Y, Down, Down, Left, Y, X for what has to be securities fraud.
Bill Ackman Is Back To Being A Real Tease
The Ackmanaissance has fully restored Bill's enjoyment of being a real naughty coquette with a new "mystery" position.
Uber's Quarterly Results Likely Causing Masa Son To Experience A Confusing Tumescence
Public company valued at $53 narrows quarterly losses to just over $1 billion...and, yes, those words are "narrows" and "quarterly"
Former McDonald's CEO Ironically Having It His Way After Acknowledging That He Was Lovin' It Up With An Underling
The board behind the golden arches is giving Stephen Easterbrook a $37 million Happy Meal with his pink slip.
The NFL Needs "Medicare For Itself"
A troubling string of poorly-treated and even more poorly-handled injuries are a real problem for an already problematic league.
Man Who Drank Tequila And Smoked Pot Barefoot On Company Jet Allegedly Thought Maternity Leave Was Paid Vacation
The Adam Neumann platinum parachute lawsuits are coming in hot, and the first one is a doozy.
Cranky Area Senior Is Writing Bitchy Letters To Politicians Again
Leon Cooperman is trying to accidentally get a Democrat elected again with his unsolicited angry "Advice."
WeWork Is The Kind Of Investment That Would Have Appealed To 2016 Bill Ackman, Says 2019 Bill Ackman
In fact, Mr. Neri Oxman thinks the whole thing is worth roughly $0.
Ray Dalio Is Worried About The Global Economy [This Is New Content, Not A Rerun]
The Wizard of the Westport Woods is becoming the new Dr. Doom.
Area Company With $4 Billion In Debt And Annual Losses Of $3 Billion Would Like To Sell You A Credit Card
Nobody handles money like Uber, so Uber needs more money to handle.