Cryptocurrencies

The Justice Department is going holistic on wrongdoers.

The SEC can’t issue subpoenas over Zoom.

For on that day, which shall go down in history, you shall gain the ability to trade bitcoins without trading bitcoins or even having bitcoins traded on your behalf.

Maybe Congress would like to take Gary Gensler off its back? Please?

He’s back to calling them worthless and comparing them to cigarettes.

The Justice Department has a new squad of crypto-cops, a new taste for white-collar criminal enforcement, a new demand for cyber-ransom notifications. And if you happen to know where all of Tether’s money is, it would appreciate a call on that, as well.

Having gritted their teeth through Gary Gensler and Rohit Chopra, the pitchforks are out for Saule Omarova.

With a mere $2.5 billion each, they are both among the 332.8 million poorest Americans.

After all, once there’s no epidemic for Ron DeSantis to screw up and he’s president, there’s no reason not to.

And also, you know, his ability to save cryptos going forward.

There was at least one thing you allegedly couldn’t do during the madness.

And she doesn’t like cryptos any better than him.

Since all that work will be moot soon enough, once they cease to be.

Now that the meme-based cryptocurrency is not much of a joke anymore, it’s finally a funny one.

The old is new again and again and again. And Steve Cohen and Cathie Wood want more of it.

Selections from the cutting-room floor of Gary Gensler’s Senate Banking Committee testimony.

The highlight of this year’s SALT conference make by Skybridge’s latest attempt to lose money in crypto.

Actually, he’s not saying anything. Just suing.