David Einhorn
Merrick Garland Gets Busy
The Justice Department has a new squad of crypto-cops, a new taste for white-collar criminal enforcement, a new demand for cyber-ransom notifications. And if you happen to know where all of Tether’s money is, it would appreciate a call on that, as well.
David Einhorn Makes It Through Quarterly Letter About ‘Breaking Markets’ Without Mentioning SPACs
Maybe because the SPAC cops are the only regulators left on a beat.
Last Year’s Markets Were So Can’t Miss Even David Einhorn Made Money
You’d still have been better off in an index fund, but it remains a fact.
Is The Ackmanaissance Innoculating Ackmania Sufferers?
David Einhorn’s symptoms have been downgraded to mild.
Elon Musk Unveils Much-Delayed, Overpriced Product
Nope, it’s not a Cybertruck with an actual unbreakable windshield.
David Einhorn Salves Further Losses With Froth From Elon Musk’s Mouth
What’s good for Tesla is good for America, in the opinion of one Twitter user.
Steve Cohen Doesn’t Want A Baseball Team Badly Enough To Get Screwed Over By A Couple Of Long Island Real Estate Nincompoops
The deal to bring black edge (and success) to Flushing is off.
David Einhorn A Big Fan Apple TV+, Disney+
Possibly too big a fan, but he’s bedridden with Ackmania for Netflix.
David Einhorn Showing Symptoms Of Ackmania Again
He’s still way up on the year, but not quite as way up as he had been.
David Einhorn Evincing Signs Of Late-Stage Ackmania
D-Hornz -who is shorting Tesla- is demanding Elon Musk resign from Tesla, which we're pretty sure is cheating.
New ‘Billions’ Writer Loves Billionaires
And not just because he can kick their ass at poker.
David Einhorn Steals Our Joke In Q2 Investor Letter
Yeah, Chewy IS a lot like Pets.com, David, where have we heard THAT before?
Surprise Mexico Tariffs Claim Least Surprising Victim
Oh, David Einhorn, things are going to get better...we think.
David Einhorn Is So Broke That He’s Pitching Airplane Leases At Sohn
The Greenlight Lantern only spent about a minute calling Elon Musk a bullshitter.
David Einhorn Still Murmuring Incantations Of Death Over Elon Musk Voodoo Doll, Is Feeling Like It's Working
Greenlight Capital telling investors that Tesla is at least on the verge of being on the verge of dying, and D-Hornz is showing signs of late-stage Ackmania.
Forbes Names David Einhorn As This Year's Youngest Self-Unmade Billionaire
Oh, D-Hornz, you need to cure this Ackmania.
Somewhere, David Einhorn Is Reading "Consumer Reports" Like Teenage David Einhorn Used To Read "Playboy"
When Tesla gets punched, Ackmania is one hell of a drug.
David Einhorn Tells Investors The Only Thing That Went Wrong in 2018 Was All Of His Investing
D-Hornz is becoming the William Faulkner of hedge fund investor letters.
David Einhorn Follows Worst Year Of His Life With New Worst Year Of His Life
His ‘portfolio that makes a lot of sense’ lost 34% in 2018.
No Gelt For Greenlight
It’s safe to say that David Einhorn’s gonna be down this year unless he kills Elon Musk or something.