DUIs

Now he's not doing much driving at all.

It's no secret that one of our favorite hedge fund wives is Lisa Maria Falcone. Whether she's imploring bitches to throw their hands in air, hiring little people for her twin daughters' birthday party, spooning her pet pig, or simply flitting about town in outfits that go from gladiator chic to deconstructed "Like A Virgin," the woman is her own special brand of fabulous. LMF started keeping a considerably lower profile once her husband Phil's hedge fund hit a streak of bad luck though we always knew she'd be back. Unfortunately, we'd hoped the woman who does what she wants, haters of the Upper East Side be damned, would return with the news her production company was putting the finishing touches on Wilbur Falcone's debut album and not this: ...at 2:25 p.m., 48-year-old Lisa Marie Falcone of Manhattan crashed her vehicle at the corner of Montauk Highway and Hayground Road in Bridgehampton, police said. She was found to be to be under the influence of alcohol and prescription medication, police said. Falcone...was charged with driving while intoxicated. Listen, lady: Throwing back a few cocktails when your closet is having two-for-one happy hour is one thing but getting loaded up on booze and pills and going for a drive is quite another. You could have hurt someone or yourself and then Phil would've had to raise Wilbur on his own. Is that what you want? 2 Charged With DWI Crashes in Hamptons [Long Island Press, mugshot via BI]

Planning to knock off work early every evening from now through Labor Day and/or take the edge off life with some adult beverages during lunch because it's summer and you deserve it? Want to have "fun" but not do anything "crazy"? If parking your car in a stranger's backyard via their house constitutes a line you don't want to cross, and you have roughly the same alcohol tolerance as a 21 year-old female, consider telling co-workers and friends you want to be cut off at a dozen drinks. Fourteen, max. A Long Island prosecutor said today that a preliminary field test indicated that the Brooklyn woman who crashed through a house had consumed about 15 drinks before the accident. Police arrested 21-year-old Sophia Anderson following the crash Monday at 4 a.m. in Huntington. Anderson is accused of DWI after her red Mercedes-Benz CLK 320 in the rear of 96-year-old Helen Indiere’s once-tidy home. The car smashed through the home, ending up in the backyard. She suffered scrapes and bruises, while an unidentified passenger was not injured. Indiere who was inside the house and her caretaker were miraculously not injured. Anderson pleaded not guilty on Tuesday. Bail was set at $50,000. A Suffolk County prosecutor said a preliminary field test at the crash scene indicated a blood-alcohol reading of 0.30. Each alcoholic drink raises the level by about 0.02. The legal limit is 0.08. Anderson's lawyer questioned the validity of the sobriety test. NY prosecutor: Woman drunk drove car through house [WSJ] B'klyn woman had 'over a dozen drinks' in her at time of crash: DA [NYP]