After dressing up the world's most potent financial services company as a 90's era M&A i-bank, DJ D-Sol is apparently into cosplay.
America’s naughtiest lender will stay under Fed punishment for the whole year.
He's definitely not not running.
Mike Corbat: “I got creamed by that December volatility…come at me, bro.”
It's nice when the little people get a W.
He's done talking about it...OKAY?!
If you read closely, you can see where the ayahuasca Elon drank before the earnings call kicks in during the Q&A.
The Zuck is reporting a diluted EPS of "Deez NUTS!"
No one saw this coming.
Yay BofA! Sorry unemployeds/people across the pond.
So that's nice for...the bank.
So that's something new and exciting.
Even though they had a plan and everything! Son of a!
Deutsche staffers aren't the only ones who just want to say "F*ck this hell hole." But we can't always get what we want, can we?
Layoffs - money laundering legal fees = profit!
He stopped just sort of saying "Never Tweet."
It's Elon math, so you wouldn't understand... you plebe.
Quarterly earnings vs quarterly fines.