Jeffrey Epstein

And they’ve seen him rap and eat.

It could have happened to any political leader or captain of industry, if you think about it.

And there’s no end in sight to the torrents of Epstein-related ink.

Definitely nothing to worry about, dear limited partners!

Like having to send this regretful letter to clients, assuring that he never lied to them about Jeffrey Epstein.

It’s measured in eight figures.

Apologies to the Virgin Islands authorities, but in spite of the shared last name, he’s got no idea where to find him.

Denise George has some questions (and document requests) for the billionaire.

Turns out no one’s born with the moniker “RELATIONSHIP MANAGER-1.”

Maybe next time listen to those voices asking, “Is it a good idea to do business with a sex offender?”

You might think they’re not related issues, but to Edward Bramson it’s like the big reveal in the DaVinci Code, a book I have not read.

They’d like to know if he improperly kept his underwear on in his disclosures to them.

Not that his retirement has anything to do with the dead pedophile, of course.

Answer: How all Dartmouth men eat.

In a bizarre interview, Stuart Pivar claims Epstein “couldn’t help himself,” while insisting that his victims were “complicit” in their own abuse.

Certainly enough (allegedly) to earn some breast meat on T-Day, if you catch my drift.

And he does it via Charlie Gasparino in case any of you were afraid this wasn't sufficiently batshit.

The 66-year-old former Bear Stearns i-banker has reportedly hung himself in his Manhattan jail cell.