Never tweet, even if it's your literal job.
Everybody give it up, one last time, for Gao Jue.
Resist if you like, but sooner or later, y'all will come around.
Though it'll be a while before Robert Stewart "plays golf" [wink wink] again.
So that's something new and exciting.
But not at themselves for apparently not knowing what the job of first year analyst entails.
Turns out gambling at the office is not a great idea.
"Even his bookie expressed sympathy for him."
Groups like the "Outlaw Gangsta Crips" and "Van Dyke Money Gang" are making JP Morgan and co. their victims.
And not just one each month. Take 'em all!
Don't ask JP Morgan for an explanation why it wrote complaints about an ex-employee and put clients signatures on the bottom.
KCG Holdings is probably going to fired...with the door open to be rehired.
Good for JP Morgan employees, less good for JP Morgan peers, who are gonna be hearing a lot of "Why can't you be more like JP Morgan?"
Funny YouTube clips generally ease the sting of rejection, yes?
Michael Oppenheim isn't saying it's JP Morgan's fault the bank didn't catch his thievery quicker, but he's not NOT saying it.
But only the naughty ones.