markets
Dying Industry Pins Hope On Idiots Buying Into An Impossible Trade Deal
Hedge funds are finding Alpha in the fallacy of a US/China trade accord.
Area Stock Market Still Being Gaslit By Controlling Older Boyfriend
Why would Larry Kudlow lie to Mr. Market? He LOVES Mr. Market!
China Tells White House "Nice Stock Market You Got There, Would Be A Shame If You Got Mouthy And Something Were To Happen To It"
The Xi Gang is unsubtly telling Team Trump to play along with Beijing if it wants to keep the markets sanguine on a trade deal.
Peter Navarro Wants To Make It Clear That All Ideas Obviously Coming From Him Should Be Treated As Fake News
Did you really believe the White House was barring all US investment in Chinese markets? What are you, Peter Navarro?
WeWork Takes A More Holistic And Forward-Thinking View Of Its Consciousness Regarding The IPO Process
Translation: Masa Son pulled the plug on this thing last night because of course he did.
Man Who Lost To Vanilla Ice On "Dancing With The Stars" Attempts To Quell Oil Market Fears Of Sectarian War In Middle east
When Iranian missiles hit Saudi refineries, Rick Perry is the man you want to hear from.
Area Man Capitulates, Market Rejoices, Takes It Back, Markets Weep
The White House is considering "an interim trade deal" with China.
Markets Considering Possibility That Escalating Tariffs Between Two Largest Global Economies Are Indeed Bad
Rising costs on goods might be bad for consumers AND manufacturers, muses everyone.
Ray Dalio Is Losing Money Because Everyone Else Is Too Stupid To Realize That We're In A Recession, Says Ray Dalio
The Wizard of the Westport Woods needs all you Najarian-watching morons to listen the f up.
Trump Asks Jamie, BriMo And Corbat "WTF Is Happening To My Market, You Guys?"
So even the White House doesn't know who's running Wells Fargo.
If You're Trying To Pretend To Be Excited About China Trade Deal Rumors Again, Maybe Don't Look At The Yield Curve
Is it harder to keep swallowing the algo headline bullshit with an inverted yield curve?
Goldman Sach Is Pretty Sure That Stocks Are Done, Like, Going Up
David Kostin tells clients that this bull is barely breathing.
Instagram Is Tweaking The Narcissism Algorithm That Rules Social Media
Bold move here from a suddenly very emboldened Facebook.
LaCroix Needs To Add Booze Or GTFO
The age of alcoholic seltzer is upon us, so National Beverage Corp. needs to evolve or die.
Index Fundamentals Clearly Dictated By Whims Of Illuminati And Satan
A research note from Hipster Trader.
Loony Parades, Bad Tweets And Cognitive Dissonance: Donald Trump's 4th Of July BBQ Menu
A modest proposal for what POTUS can do with those tanks after his parade.
Trump's Special China Trade Truce Episode Is Actually A Summer Rerun From Sweeps
The "Dumb Goldfish" economy is doing its thing.
Despair, Youth, For The Avocado Market Is Truly F'ed
Bitcoin crashing while avocado prices surge in what we are calling The Hipsterpocalypse.
Markets No Longer Capable Of Caring About What's Real Or What's Fake
Would your broker eat this banana?
Bitcoin Surging So All The Old Mistakes Are New Again
Let's get crypto crunk in 2019!
Jay Powell To Trump: You Can't Touch This...Please
Also, FOMC holds rates steady for June.
Markets Soar After Manufactured Crisis Is Narrowly Avoided By Having Already Been Solved Months Ago
The wisdom of the markets is something else these days.