tech
The Winkelvii Acquired A CryptoKitties-Based Startup Founded By Another Pair Of Identical Twins, And Those Are All Words We Just Typed
Tyler and Cameron are all about The Brothers Cock Foster and their "nifties."
Dying Industry Pins Hope On Idiots Buying Into An Impossible Trade Deal
Hedge funds are finding Alpha in the fallacy of a US/China trade accord.
Guy Who Founded Uber Realizes He Owns Way Too Much Uber Stock
Travis Kalanick wasted no time getting about $500 million lighter on his UBER shares.
Good News, Single Ladies, Steve Schwarzman Owns Bumble Now
Blackstone owns everyone's favorite feminist dating app...and that's quite the sentence.
Uber's Quarterly Results Likely Causing Masa Son To Experience A Confusing Tumescence
Public company valued at $53 narrows quarterly losses to just over $1 billion...and, yes, those words are "narrows" and "quarterly"
Area Company With $4 Billion In Debt And Annual Losses Of $3 Billion Would Like To Sell You A Credit Card
Nobody handles money like Uber, so Uber needs more money to handle.
In These Chaotic Times, We Can Still Rely On Tesla To Post A Solid Quarterly Loss
You are our constant, Elon Musk.
Softbank Paying Adam Neumann $1.7 Billion To Just Please Stop Elevating The World's Consciousness
Masa Son remains clearly determined to make Neumann look like a transformative business genius.
Masayoshi Son Ready To Bring His Total Investment In WeWork To $15 Billion...At An $8 Billion Valuation, Because YOLO
SoftBank is ready to fix WeWork because co-dependent relationships are toxic.
Goldman Sachs Has Come Around To The Logic Of Not Paying People Goldman Sachs Salaries
Average comp is down 50% at 200 West Street, unless you're a robot, in which case, you're taking John Rogers' job.
Robinhood Now Daring Goldman Sachs Not To Acquire It
DJ D-Sol should ask Charles Schwab about the wisdom of ignoring the kamikaze trading platform for Millennials.
Don't EVEN Talk To Chuck Schwab About These Money-Losing Tech Stocks
Charles Schwab thinks this modern IPO market might be bullsh!t.
WeWork Asking Jamie Dimon "Why Stop Now, Baby?"
What's left of We is hoping JPM will pony up $2 billion to keep the kombucha taps running, but that would almost certainly come with Dimon-strenght strings attached.
WeWork About To Get Hammered For Finally Acting Like An Adult
Officially pulling the IPO is going to hurt, but it's time for pain at We.
Silicon Valley Is Reinventing Mental Healthcare In The Most Silicon Valley Way Possible
Tech workers turn to apps and hypnosis to treat depression, anxiety… and Irritable Bowel Syndrome
WeWork Calms Investors By Pointing Out That One Of Its New CEOs Knows All About Success From That Time He Worked At AOL
Maybe We should highlight Artie Minson's other gigs?
WeWork CEO Decides He's Not Working Anymore
Adam Neumann to spend more time with family...getting them to fund his superfood juicing platform.
WeWork Takes A More Holistic And Forward-Thinking View Of Its Consciousness Regarding The IPO Process
Translation: Masa Son pulled the plug on this thing last night because of course he did.
WeWork Asks Wall Street To Value It At More Than $20 Billion Or GTFO
This is escalating quickly.
WeWork Now Offering IPO Investors A 50% Discount On Pretending That WeWork Is A Real Company
Adam Neumann is experimenting with quasi-realistic thinking.
Silicon Valley CEOs Are Letting Employees Expense Their Trips To Burning Man And Tell Us Again About Interest Rates Being Too High
There's economic data in the Orgy Dome.
WeWork Sued By Landlord For Allegedly Making $150 Million Disappear
In a new lawsuit, the owner of 120 East 16th Street accuses WeWork of playing bait and switch with deposits.
Uber Saves $200K On Balloons, Tacitly Admits To Shareholders It Was Spending $200K On Balloons
Actual...f@cking...balloons.